Challenges

So, y'all know I have 3 kids, right now... right? I've had 10 foster kids to date, and adopted my daughter, Lil M, when she was 9 months old. I have 2 fosters right now, who I am hoping to adopt sometime this year (spring, even). They are 9 years and 2 years old.

As you can imagine, Lil M is doing pretty well. She's 8 now and typical and precocious... She's a good girl, but can be not-so-nice to her older sister when she gets upset about something. We're working on that, as much as we can, anyway. She's my heart song.

The 2.5 year old is a firecracker. She's a typical 2-yo in a lot of ways, but, boy, does she have a temper. She likes to throw fits. She's adorable, which works to her advantage... she's going to be stubborn and give me a run for my money, I'm afraid. But I love her to pieces.

The 9 year old is the one who is the challenge for me. She came to me when she was 6... almost 3 years ago now. She has attachment issues and this results in lying, stealing, breaking things (like her brand new scrapbook I just let them put together), and taking food without permission. Other people think I'm overreacting... but when she stands in the middle of the kitchen with that look on her face that says she has no idea what she's doing ...when she's done that task tons of times... it's maddening. I do love her, and maybe more importantly, I am committed to her.

Just one example: Imagine a child who knows how to put dishes away from the dishwasher. She comes into the kitchen and starts to put things away. Then she just stands there, mouth agape and acting like she doesn't know what she's doing all of the sudden. Very slow processing. Takes over 1/2 hour to put things away that should take 5-10 minutes. Finally, I give up and tell her to go away so I can get dinner finished and on the table. You say, why does it matter? Well. It matters. She KNOWS how to put things away. I don't understand her brain. Why does she just stop and act like she doesn't know what she's doing? It doesn't seem like her mind is somewhere else, but maybe it is. Maybe it is control. Maybe it is wanting attention. Maybe it isn't any of that... I need to find us a therapist who can help. My concern is that with how much she lies (like breathing some days, and others it is less), I worry that she'll snow a therapist. But I would love to her her and I both some help for this.

I love my life and my girls. Some days are tough, I won't lie.

Peace.