Sunday, November 14, 2010

rare form

The girls went home this afternoon, and all got back to normal... except T and I haven't been feeling well. Found some medicine she can take, and I got some for the both of us.

Lil M was in extremely rare form today. First, she got in all kinds of trouble all day. She gave the baby candy, she and the baby were 'bouncing' on the bed... she and the baby sat on top of a table where they weren't allowed.... All while the teen mom was in proximity. So much for that. Then, tonight she got more candy knowing she needed to ask first. Needless to say, I was none too happy and she got in trouble again. :(

Now, you're probably thinking... this is typical behavior for a 4 year old. And, most 4 year olds you'd be right. But, Lil M doesn't usually just completely disregard the rules. She is usually pretty easy to correct. Not this weekend. :( Kind of bums me out, actually... 'cause I'm worried this might be a trend, and kind of worried I've not been paying enough attention to her... at the right times.

I have a feeling she was pretty jealous of the baby this weekend. Which, I guess I wanted to learn because we'll have one in the house come January.

Then, on top of it, she kept asking me about the woman whose tummy she was in. Once, I was so cavalier as to believe that not having answers would be OK and that it wouldn't be too hard to explain. Boy, was I wrong. I try to keep it straight forward and in 4 year old language... but, frankly, I don't know what to say.

The teen asked me a lot of questions this weekend, too. This being adoption month makes me think about how lucky I am to have Lil M. But it also makes me realize even more that other people just don't get it. They don't get adoption. What has felt so completely natural to me, is just not seen that way by others. Why aren't you married? Are you infertile? Why didn't you have one of your own?

I get it from both sides. Lil M wants to know whose tummy she was in, and others want to know what's wrong with me. Yeah. Not.

And me, well, I realize that I need to come up with my own answers.



Laraf123 said...

Ok, A) these spam comments from "Dan Eliot" are annoying; B) I know I'm no expert but I don't think this is a long-term trend. Lil M is surrounded by babies, babies-to-be and tummies. She's curious, of course. But she knows who her mommy is. Our local parenting magazine just ran a notice for workshops addressing this very issue for kids when they start asking questions and (more their focus) when other people start asking them questions. I thought that was a great idea; C) Grown-ups who ask you prying questions are annoying and lack the good manners God gave them. It's none of their business how your precious family came to be. I often think those questions come from people who secretly wish they'd become SMCs.
There, that's my long-winded two cents!

Mama Melissa said...

I agree about the spam comments.. i'm trying to get them deleted. i am trying to not go moderated...

I think you're right about the other stuff. :) Thanks for your encouragement. We had a 'family' movie night tonight... and watched a movie with Mia. We need to do more of these. :)

Now, if only I felt better. Cold is in full force. bah.